So...what happens when that child (the child we each chose, mind you) gives you the cold shoulder? What happens when they won't eat 99% of what you put in front of them? Tantrums? Nobody said anything about tantrums!! Hygiene issues? No problem! As soon as I give this little angel some instruction, all will be right with the world... they will see the error of their ways, and boom! Problem solved! WRONG.
What happens when that child embarrasses the tar out of you by being rude to someone? Or when you hear a new English word come out of that sweetheart's mouth that has four letters. And that word isn't LOVE, people! What if they lie to you?
No English? No problem! We've got Google Translate! Oh wait, it only works Russian to English like 2% of the time? Dang.
Let me get this straight... sweet little Ukrainian orphans can roll their eyes, disobey, push boundaries, act ungratefully and/or disrespectfully, shut down, act like slobs, and cop an attitude when they don't get their way?? But, but...they looked so sweet in their pictures! Our angel was wearing a sweatshirt with a puppy dog on it, for cryin' out loud! Have we been duped?!
Here's the thing. We weren't duped. Nobody "triple dog dared" any of us to host. All of us KNEW it would be hard. Maybe it's hard in ways that we didn't realize at the time, but it's not like any of us were expecting a walk in the park. The bottom line is...these kids are orphans. They are WOUNDED. They are HURTING. They have been neglected, abandoned, abused, and forced to fend for themselves. They have been plopped into homes with strangers that they can't understand. The food is new. The culture is new. The smells and sights are new. Being part of a family is new. Imagine what it's like for them!
You might be thinking, "Um...why did you guys do this, exactly? Maybe you should just stick with those newborns!" Well, I'll start with telling you why we did NOT do it. We did NOT do it because we are awesome. We are selfish and grumpy and our attitudes are often terrible. We did NOT do it because we couldn't think of anything else to spend our money on. We did NOT do it because we are experts at parenting a teen. "Clueless, your table for two is ready...Clueless..." We did NOT do it because we love a good challenge. I speak for all of the host families when I say...we are nothing special, and this is hard.
We all chose to bring a child into our home for Christmas because we are blessed. It is that simple. Luke 12:48 says that to whom much is given, much will be required. We have an extra spot at our table, and an extra seat in the van. We have plenty of food in our 'fridge and pantry. We have a warm house with lots of love (sprinkled with just a touch of fighting and yelling, for good measure)- we have support from family and friends, and we have a heart for orphans.
There. Are. So. Many. Orphans.
The need is greater than you can even imagine. Foster care, adoption, mentoring, helping financially, etc. Everyone can help, and we are just trying to do our part. We have been given much.James 1:27
Religion that God our Father accepts as pure and faultless is this: to look after orphans and widows in their distress...
That. Was. So. Well. Put.
ReplyDeleteOn one hand, I'd like to say I'm sorry that this has been so hard. On the other hand, I'd like to say that you're lucky. I know that my greatest blessings in life have come from my most difficult times. The burden you feel in your heart for the orphan will only be lessened by following His plan for you.... even when that plan involves temper tantrums and teen 'tude. :) In fact, I'd venture to say that He only chose you for this particular path because He knows you will rise to the challenge by relying on His strength and wisdom. In the meantime, throw back some spiked egg nog and enjoy the ride!!! I am so blessed to know you and your family Tracy. I LOVE reading of your adventures and listening to you advocate for the orphan!!!!!!! Hang in there!!! xoxo Britt
Like our bestie Katie says, "I believe God does give us more than we can handle, so we are forced to do things in His strength and not ours!"
DeleteYOUR family inspired the pants off of me. I'm actually sitting here in my underwear right now.
Such a great post, Tracy...from the heart. Thanks for keeping it real. I, too, am sorry it hasn't been easier, but in my experience, nothing pertaining to orphan care is. BUT, God has called us to do it, and so we must. And in the process, we learn it's not about us. And we learn that God equips, one day...heck!...one minute at a time! And we are stronger for it. I so love your heart! Blessings, my friend!
ReplyDeleteTerri- you are SO right. Orphan care is a big ol' pile of MESSY. I know it's on God's heart though, so it better be on ours. :-)
DeleteAnd so true that it's not "about us". When I fall into the trap of thinking that it is, that's when things go south quickly!
Tracy, I love you girl! I love reading your updates and I love your honesty! I'm praying for you guys!
ReplyDeleteI didn't know you had a blog! Thanks for following mine.
Deletegreat post t! love you guys and Jesus in and through you! THANKS FOR BEING REAL!!
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