Secure All Loose Articles, and Enjoy Your Ride

Isn't it hard to believe that tomorrow morning we will be driving back to Dulles Airport?  WOW.  In some ways, our last trip to Dulles seems like a lifetime ago.  In other ways, time really flew.  We have very mixed emotions about the whole hosting experience.  In some ways, we are disappointed.  Disappointed that a family didn't step forward for any of the Richmond kids (yet, anyways).  Disappointed that as much as I wanted us to be that family, it is not meant to be.  Disappointed in my grossness, but more on that later...

In other ways, we are absolutely thrilled with how it all went down.  This was intended to be a hosting experience, and nothing more.  Don't get me wrong:  finding Alyona a forever family would have been the icing on the cake, but that was not the purpose of her trip.  She was able to experience being part of a family for the very first time.  Her first plane ride, her first trip to America, her first time bowling and ice skating, her first time decorating Christmas cookies and a gingerbread house, her first time at a drive-in theater, her first ballet. She was told that Jesus died on the cross because he loves her so much.  She made new friends, got all beautified for a dance,  tried new foods (a couple, anyways!), had some down time to relax, and opened more Christmas presents than she probably has opened in her lifetime.

Chris and I had the privilege of watching her experience so many new and wonderful things.  We learned a lot about her, but many questions were raised, too.  We watched as God met our physical and emotional needs through amazing friends, family, and even strangers.  Like most exciting things...hosting was like a roller coaster. Sometimes I had my arms in the air yelling, "YIPPEE" as the wind blew through my hair.  Other times, I knew that if we hit one more loop I would surely lose my lunch.

In reference to my "grossness" comment above, this experience has shown me what I knew to be true but was hoping wasn't.  I was not as grace giving and patient as I wanted to be.  In fact, she got on my nerves many, many times.  Today was probably the worst, in that respect.  I realize I'm taking a huge risk sharing this, and you might be thinking, "She's an ORPHAN!!!  How dare you lose your patience with her- get a life, Scoggins!!!!  You stink!"

Well, I've thought that about myself quite a bit, too!  Ugh-yuck!!!!  It is in those moments when I remember that without relying on God at every turn, I'm a huge failure.

1 Timothy 15-16 says this:

Here is a trustworthy saying that deserves full acceptance: Christ Jesus came into the world to save sinners—of whom I am the worst. ¹⁶ But for that very reason I was shown mercy so that in me, the worst of sinners, Christ Jesus might display his immense patience, as an example for those who would believe in him and receive eternal life.

"Immense patience."  Ouch.
Let's look at today:  I started out being pretty tired from going to bed too late the last few nights.  I knew we had to get Alyona packed, and there were a lot of clothes to wash and go through (keep pile vs. "can't fit in the suitcase" pile).  Our kids were fighting, as usual.  The house was a mess, with Alyona's room being an absolute pit.  She was very neat on day one.  We haven't seen that kid since.

I wanted to take down the Christmas tree and decorations, get them put in the attic, and get the house cleaned.  The kids broke no fewer than 4 ornaments.  Alyona was watching her videos, as usual, chomping on gum so loudly that I'm sure the neighbors were wondering, "What is that noise?!"  When I would ask her to do something to help, she would huff and puff and roll her eyes, and then do the bare minimum of what I requested.  We have very different interpretations of "make your bed" and "clean your room", apparently.  I was frustrated that she wasn't lifting a finger to help me, meanwhile, thinking of all the other host families who tell me how much their host kids just loooove cleaning.  I think we got a dud!  I found pistachio shells on the carpet in her bedroom.  (Hmmmm...I'm quite certain I said those were for the plane and not to open them), as well as lollipop sticks and other various trash.  And what's this in the corner behind the sofa?  Oh!  Tangerine peels!  Awesome!

I asked her to go get my earrings that she had borrowed shortly after arriving here.  She said, "later."  Um....I was actually thinking NOW would be good.  They are my favorites and I was anxiously awaiting their return to my dresser, especially knowing that she received SEVERAL pairs of earrings for Christmas.  She returned with one. And it was broken.  OK, deep breaths, woman!  Get a grip- they're just earrings!

We then went to Costco, where she grabbed a shopping cart and promptly ran it straight into the back of my foot. You've felt that, right?  Not pleasant.  Especially with a super sized Costco cart.
We picked up about 90 prints, and I worked so hard to put them all in chronological order.  I handed them to her beaming, so she could put them in her photo albums... and she dropped them on the floor.

None of the above were big deals on their own, but they combined to produce...my perfect storm.

I shared my feelings with Chris, and he reminded me that she doesn't have manners because nobody taught her any.  Husbands, don't do that.  Just listen.  It made me feel worse, like a big loser.

So there you have it!!  This has not been easy and she gets on my nerves, sometimes.  She embarrassed me in public a lot, being loud and weird.  She wouldn't flush her TP no matter how much I begged.  (That does not make your bathroom smell very nice, FYI)
Did we make that "love connection  I was hoping for?  No, we did not.

But you know what's crazy???  I would do it all again!!!  Three weeks out of my life is nothing.  It's a blip.  Three weeks in light of eternity???  Less than a blip!!  A blippette!  BUT, there was eternal VALUE in it!!  Who knows what her time here could mean for the rest of her life!?.  Only God knows that, and he loves her a million times more than we ever could.

This experience forced us to be uncomfortable for someone else.  Cole slept on the couch for 3 weeks...and he survived!  In fact, it was good for him.  Making sacrifices so someone else can have something is a great thing.  We were reminded that the things we take for granted (like family, a home, extra money to do special things) are luxuries that not everyone has.  So what that there were tangerine peels behind the couch (in the room where we told her not to bring food) and my earrings are gone.  So What!!  We loved her and gave her a family, if even for a short time.  It was worth it all.

Children are hosted each Christmas and for 5 weeks over the summer.  I want you to do something crazy...just think about it.  Think about hosting and putting yourself out there for the sake of an orphan.  Your  house might be a mess and heck, you might not even make a love connection...and that's OK!!!  You never know until you try.  And you may never know the impact you've made an another life.  So worth it all.