Well, it's been three full days with Alyona. So far, so good.
Her internal clock still seems to be on Ukraine time, and she is a very early riser. Hasn't come out of her room later than 6:30am yet. I thought teenagers liked to sleep in?!
Reid will finally head back to school tomorrow, after being home all week recovering from the flu. It will be nice to have 2 days just with Alyona and Chris, before the kids are off for Christmas break.
I think our challenge has been what to do with her when we are home. When we are out and about (which she loves) it's fairly easy. When we are home, she is resistant to playing games, and conversing via the Google Translate isn't working very well. She pretty much wants to watch Russian videos on You Tube, and that's about it. We are trying to engage her , but it's hard. In addition, we do have some day to day, regular "life things" that need to be done. I think the struggle for us is feeling like we need to entertain her, or be "on" at every moment. Does that make sense? We are trying to just let that go, and not feel guilty when we treat her more as a temporary part of the family, than a house guest.
Last night a friend came over for dinner and to translate. She was absolutely wonderful, and it was SO NICE being able "talk" rather than type everything out or play charades. Most of what Alyona shared about her past, present and future was totally different than what we've been told by other sources. So, we are left pretty confused and not knowing what's true. What we do know for sure is that she has had a hard life. She said she was dropped off at the orphanage when she was 5 months old, "by her sister" (who was 7 at the time, so that really doesn't make sense). She also said that she started school at age 10, which is why she is 15 and in 7th grade. She has a lot of trouble spelling, and when we attempted to play UNO today, she insisted that 6 and 9 were the same number. She said "six and six!", no matter how many times we said, "no, that is a NINE", she just kept shaking her head no and calling it a six. She has NO interest in reading, and we're wondering if it's because she can't read very well. She can read what I type out on Google Translate, but those are pretty short, basic sentences. Many questions- many unknowns.
In other news, today was dentist day. Sorry, for those of you who have been following on Facebook- this might be repetitive. She has EIGHT cavities. Yikes. So, we'll head back tomorrow to fill four of them (hopefully), and we'll go back a 3rd time to fill the other 4. The hygienist said she had what looked like years of build up, and even just cleaning them would be best with some Novocaine. Serious plaque scraping ahead, people!
She was a good sport about the whole thing, and knows that she will be going back for fillings and seems fine with it.
After the dentist, we went to Short Pump Town Center and had lunch in the food court. She is becoming a pickier eater. She didn't want to try last night's lasagna, and although she picked chicken parm on top of spaghetti for lunch, she didn't like that either. Thankfully, fruit is a good plan B.
I thought she would be more "impressed" with the mall (especially that particular mall), but she didn't seem to be. I think she lives in a city, so maybe Richmond is nothing special.
After lunch, she was treated to a manicure...which she LOVED. She is very much a girly girl, and although good hygeine isn't her strong suit (cultural, plus she never had parents to teach her), she does very much care about her appearance. She was all dressed up in a skirt with tights and Loren's fake pearls this morning. :-) She changed into jeans this afternoon.
One thing that is VERY different for her is just living in a house with a family. She has NEVER done that. She is adjusting well and seems comfortable. She is pretty messy (room looks like a cyclone hit it, although on the first day she made the bed and had everything in its place. I guess the "I will try to impress my host parents" honeymoon phase was short lived!)
She is very good with the kids and they are quite tolerant of her and the changes she has made in their lives. For example, Cole gave up his room for her and he sleeps on the couch, Loren pretty much lets Alyona carry her everywhere and even feed her (that's a sight to see), and she ALWAYS holds Reid's hand when we are out walking anywhere. Trust me- he is not interested in being "babied" like that, but he puts up with it without complaint. We are proud of the kids, and I suppose that having babies in and out of the house for the past 2.5 years has made sharing their home and their parents with Alyona seem very normal.
Tonight we went to a Christmas party at church. When we GOT there, everyone was in festive Christmas attire (hats, bells, etc) As you can see, I was the only one who stayed hard core until the end. Interestingly enough, the 3 other Ukrainian girls were there, too, and they didn't really talk to each other. It was fun, but she made it clear that she was ready to go, by doing the "steer the car" charades...love it.
What an adventure! Thanks for sharing it!!
ReplyDeleteOh friend....oh friend...love it...I feel you!
ReplyDelete